Last week I posted Part One of my Zombie Survival tactics. This week it gets a little more intense...
The Crazy Bookworm Vs The Zombie Apocalypse Part 2
OK. I'm prepared, and I'm packed. Now what? You can only sit and wait for so long, so skipping that, we'll get right down to the messy part.
I'm a wimp! I run and flail my arms when I come across a spider(even if it's the size of a pinhead). So, it's going to take a lot of mental work for me to not run and just bust a cap in a zombie.
Buck up: They're here, get over it! There is nothing you can do about, but survive. Pull up your big girl panties(in my case) and look them straight in their milky eyes.
Kill: When your done staring down the zombie. Blast it. Decapitate it. Slice and dice. Do as much bodily harm to this thing that you can. And feel free to break out a cheesy movie tag-line to seal the deal. "It's just been revoked!" BANG!
BUT don't waste all your ammo or energy on just one. Think smart And...
You just ignited your inner zombie ass-kicking goddess. Once you blow one to smithereens, you'll feel great! You'll feel light and airy(okay maybe not) but you'll feel pretty fan-freaking-tastic! You've just entered survival mode, my friend.
Friend or Zombie?: It's going to happen to at least one person you care about. A friend, a neighbour, a co-worker. Someone you like and/or care for will become a Zombie. Your going to look into the (dead) eyes of your loved one and think perhaps, a little piece of them is still somewhere deep inside that rotting flesh, but remember; They are not who you once loved, or enjoyed spending time with. They are now Zombies and are only after one thing...
your brain. So again, pull up those panties, take a deep breath(say a few kind words, if you must) and put that sucker out of their misery.
Keep moving: It seems counter-productive, but once they smell your smart and intelligent brains, they will all be stumbling your way. As the wonderful Max Brooks taught us "No place is safe, only safer" so just treat it like bar-hopping, but instead of a wonderful, alcohol induced adventure with your friends, it's a run for your life marathon. Hop from place to place and keep moving. Stay only long enough to reload, stock up, grab some quick rest and then hit up the next hot spot!
That sums up part two. Stay tuned next week when we discuss your zombie butt kicking fight club and a possible love interest???
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